The Curse of the Internet

On Wednesday I was all, “It can’t be the Christmas season yet, it’s still autumn, la la la!” I should not have written that, as it turns out.

I forgot about The Curse. And not the kind of curse that comes to visit every month because it’s wonderful being a girl. No, I’m talking about The Curse of the Internet. Yesterday I extolled the virtues of the internet, but today I’m going to expose its dark underbelly. Because in addition to providing any information you could want instantly, the internet is out to get you.

Do you doubt me? Less than 24 hours after hitting publish on my “it’s still autumn” post, I woke up to this:

Snowy street

It’s a flipping winter wonderland out there. In Vancouver. In November. It’s supposed to rain in November. And rain, and rain, and rain. We’re all supposed to get a little tired of it. But snow? Not so much. We might get a few snow days in January, or maybe December. But not November.

Me in the snowy park
That smile I’m sporting is rather sheepish

I shouldn’t be surprised, though. The surest way to ensure that things don’t work out according to plan is to tell the internet about it. Your child’s toilet training is progressing fabulously? Don’t brag about it on Facebook, or they’ll refuse to use the potty for the next 4 weeks. Your toddler just started sleeping through the night? Do not, at any cost, tell Twitter all about it if you want it to continue. You also should not tell the internet that you’re picking up knitting faster than you ever expected to, or that your dinner is going to be awesome, or that it is far too early to think about winter.

Snowing in suburbia

I told you all about Bob, the little man inside the internet who makes sure that my posts go live at the correct time. Well, he has an evil twin named Bill. While Bob does his best to make life easier, Bill does his best to mess with your plans. If you tell him those plans, or let him know about your accomplishments, you’re asking for trouble. I’m not entirely sure why Bill does this, but I suspect he’s always been a little jealous of Bob. Their mom always liked him best.

Snow on the schoolyard

Constantly hearing about how awesome Bob is would give anyone a complex. But it doesn’t really matter if that’s the reason, or there’s even more backstory I haven’t heard about. Because either way, Bill had his way with me, and with everyone who lives near me, by exacting The Curse of the Internet.

Snowy shrub

As much as I’m not impressed by the wintry weather, there is an upside. Maybe Bill knew about that – maybe he’s not all bad. Snow is awfully pretty. And my kids are ecstatic. Snow! Is! So! Much! Fun! For! Kids! And if you ask Hannah, it’s pretty delicious, too.

Hannah sampling some snow

Jacob checks out the snow

We’ll do our best to enjoy the snow while it lasts, and I’ll be more careful about what I post in the future. How about you? Have you ever been bitten by The Curse of the Internet? If so, I’d love to hear all about it!

PS – As you may know, I have started including a link-up with my monthly reviews. The reviews are an informal listing of a few things I learned in the past month. My November review will go live at 6am Pacific on Wednesday, December 1. If you want to play along, write a post on or before December 1, come here, and link up!

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  1. Sooooo, can I trick Bill? As in, if I tell the Internet the opposite of what I actually want, Bill will give me what I want?

    The snow looks so beautiful and fun!

  2. I agree – the internet is a curse. For me it’s when I say that my kids are over a cold… it always backfires! So, now, instead of explicitly saying it, I try to be more discrete and ambiguous so as to fool Bill into not understanding that’s what I’m saying… I posted something on FB yesterday. We’ll see if the curse lives one today. Cross your fingers for me!
    Aida N’s last post … And then there was lightMy Profile

  3. I just stumbled on your blog as I am sitting watching footage of everyone sliding around on ice on MSNBC. I’m not ready 🙁 You’re funny… I’ve had to add you to my RSS.

  4. And… now the snow is all gone and it’s raining again (at least here in Vancouver!). This morning, I can barely see any evidence that we had a winter wonderland here yesterday! Glad to see that your kids got to enjoy this rare November snow!
    Holly’s last post … This view makes me happyMy Profile

  5. Ha! BC has snow before Ontario! It’s beautiful, I hope we get some of our own soon. Sadly, it’s been to cold for snow in Ontario.

    I am familliar with the internet curse. When I was a part of an online mommy forum a few years ago we learned pretty quickly that posting how well your baby was sleeping was a sure fire way to put an end to your wonderful luck.

  6. I will NOT tell the internet that my 16 month old is finally sleeping through the night. Because he’s so not. Hear that, Bill? He’s NOT.
    monsterchew’s last post … Knock-Knock! Whos There Pregnant Dog! Er- WhatMy Profile

  7. LOL! i was thinking just the same thing when i looked at your beautiful pics of the autumn leaves on the grass yesterday, “that’s not the view right now!”

    yes, i’ve been bitten by the curse – i generally schedule all my posts for the Blackberry Artists blog (gratuitous plug for local handmade business in there) and have learnt to preface some of my more weather-oriented ramblings with a “this has been scheduled” proviso just in case some of the readers think i am out of my tree.

    internet curse – is that like the sweater curse i wonder?
    pomomama’s last post … blowing my own trumpet thursdayMy Profile

  8. On Wednesday I wrote that my suburb gets the least amount of snow of anywhere in Vancouver. Um, thanks Bill for giving us some of the most yesterday.
    Marilyn @ A Lot of Loves’s last post … One Day- Three WaysMy Profile

  9. Oooh, that looks chilly! But beautiful.

    The picture I posted yesterday (sunshine, flowers, no jackets) was taken yesterday at my parents’ house, but we’re driving home this afternoon, where I expect it will be much colder and wetter.
    Lady M’s last post … Happy ThanksgivingMy Profile

  10. This is why Mt Rogo does NOT get updated. Oh sure, I could share…but then Bill/Fate/Murphy’s Law would get me!!

    I’m holding off a bit longer 🙂
    Carrie’s last post … The StormMy Profile

  11. I love that picture of you. I’ve had to schedule posts for many week-ends this month since I”m doing nablopomo and was away for a few of them. I was terrified Bill would work his evil shenanigans, but so far so good…I mean,, no, oh wait, oh crap….what have i done?
    allison’s last post … Merry ThursdayMy Profile

  12. I’m not loving snow in Vancouver in November either, but it sure makes it a lot easier to get into the Christmas spirit! Besides, the rain will have washed it all away very soon!
    Amanda’s last post … Wednesday of Few Words- A Toddlers First Encounter with the White StuffMy Profile

  13. Heehee. Mine is exclusively related to sleep bragging. Every tweet about a good sleep results in a week of terror. And Bill appears to be responsible for all my scheduled posts. Not a single schedule has every gone out at the correct time. They go out immediately.

  14. The internet makes the world such a small place sometimes: it snowed here too, and the only positive note that I can see is that the thermometer indicates that we’re above freezing this morning, and so I’ll be able to move the car and go grocery shopping. Very pretty hat Amber, I really like that green.
    Francesca’s last post … Early snow- empty fridgeMy Profile

  15. Vancouver looks so beautiful! My son would play outside in the snow ALL day if I let him 🙂

  16. I am one of those goofballs who immediately ran to post on my blog when my son pooped on the potty the first time. There has not yet been a second time. Thanks Bill. :-f

  17. It’s true, it’s true! If I update my scheduled post complaining that my son won’t go to sleep with an addendum saying that he has been lately, which will the internet see fit to screw with?
    Lauren @ Hobo Mama’s last post … Wordless Wednesday- Healthy eatingMy Profile

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