My Actual Christmas List

Over the past number of weeks, many of my friends and family members have asked me what I want for Christmas. I do my best to come up with answers for them. I’ve asked for household items and clothes and books and so on. It isn’t always easy for me to write up my Christmas list, though. And the reason it’s not easy? I know exactly what I want for Christmas, but you can’t buy any of it at a store.

Here’s where I issue my disclaimer: I love my kids. I love them so much, in fact, that love doesn’t even feel like a strong enough word. I would rather not die for them, but I would do it in a heartbeat if the situation required it. I entered this parenthood gig knowing that I would be making sacrifices, and I gladly make them. I understand that they’ll only be little for so long, so I try not to stress about it when they act like the normal children they are. I also understand that there are people who would give anything to have children of their own, but are not able to. I wouldn’t change my life for anything.

At the same time, let’s be honest. Parenting is hard. Sometimes it drains the life right out of you. And so, if I could have anything in the world, here’s what I’d really ask for this Christmas.

Dear Santa, please bring me the following …

A Mother’s Christmas Wish List

  1. A good night’s sleep – and more often than once every three-to-six months.
  2. Some of the dearly-loved possessions that my kids have lost or destroyed, to be returned to me in their original condition.
  3. The ability to leave the house in under 20 minutes.
  4. A floor that isn’t perpetually covered in toys, art supplies, and unidentified sticky messes.
  5. No awkward questions in front of relatives or random strangers at the grocery store.
  6. A meal that doesn’t involve any complaints about the food I bought, prepared and served to my family allbymyself.
  7. The ability to swear out loud when the situation calls for it, without running the risk that a child will repeat it and/or chastise me.
  8. The freedom to watch what I want, when I want, on my own television.
  9. Shirts that aren’t covered in unidentified stains left by little hands.
  10. For a whole week to pass without finding rotting food somewhere in my house or car.
  11. Bathroom privacy.
  12. For my hairbrush, knitting needles, dishes, books, scissors, phone bills, socks and so on to just stay where I put them.

As I said, I know that I won’t get any of these things. And really, the joy of sharing Christmas with little children makes up for it. Seeing the magic in their eyes is amazing. But, as I said, that doesn’t mean this mom gig is easy. And so it’s fun to dream, just for a little while.

What’s on your unrealistic Christmas wish list?

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  1. Ditto the leaving the house in under 20, and the serving a meal without the running commentary. I given up with withholding the swearing – at least he now knows instantly how f*#king pissed off I am with his behaviour … and we’re British; swearing is a national trait.
    What I’d really love is The End of Repetition – just how many times do I need to repeat myself to spur a nine year old into action for something he has to do Every Single Bl#*day morning???
    pomomama aka ebbandflo’s last post … tech tues: snow dayMy Profile

  2. Magical cleaning person to magically clean my kids’ rooms every night. Make that every 15 minutes. I have no issue with cleaning up rest of the house (even Lego’s, I build something out of them as I’m picking), but, their rooms get into “overwhelming even for adult” zone in a span of 10 minutes.

    Eating dinner without being interrupted upwards of 10 times… but on the other hand, I would not have it any other way.

    • Ah, yes, cleaning the kids’ rooms. My son’s room isn’t so bad, but my daughter’s is a disaster zone. It’s because her art supplies are in there. I love that she’s so creative, but it does make for a whole lot of clutter.

  3. Can I ***PLEEEAAASSEE*** have #4?
    robbie @ going green mama’s last post … The end of the world as I know itMy Profile

  4. This year I got my wish from last year – going out with only a small bag for me! I don’t have to carry half the house with me and everyone is responsible for their own coats, snacks, water bottles, etc.

    It’s wonderful!
    Christy’s last post … Advent/Solstice SpiralMy Profile

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  1. […] I shared my unrealistic Christmas wish list, which I briefly considered calling All I Want for Christmas is a Good Night’s Sleep. Today, […]

  2. […] the week before Christmas I jokingly published a post I called My Actual Christmas List. It contained items I wanted, but knew I couldn’t have, like clean floors and bathroom […]

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